Saturday, March 03, 2007

Lunar Eclipse.....


The Husband has just called me from work - he is working a night shift tonight - to let me know that there is to be a full lunar eclipse at midnight tonight.

My response: "I wonder if that is why my breasts have been so sore today?" I immediately regretted saying it. It was quite a stupid thing to say, after all. I paused.

He paused for quite a long time. I know what he was thinking: how do I respond to this pseudo-feminist, neo-pagan flakiness? Do I just take the piss, or do I sound sympathetic and thus confirm my alertness to the feminine principal and my status as a new-man?

He responded with: "Yes, my breasts have been quite sore too."

Which just about covered all bases, I thought.

45 comments:

Ms Melancholy said...

I have just been out to look at the moon, and it is a beautiful, clear, crisp night with so many stars twinkling. The moon is deep red and my breasts are hurting. I feel a desire to rip off all my clothes and dance to the mother Goddess, at the top of a big hill. I'm sure I was a witch in a former life.

PS is it very sad to be the first to comment on your own post?

Reading the Signs said...

I have been out looking as well! Just smoked the last of my illicit cigarettes as homage. Well it was too cold to rip off clothes - crisp, as you said.

No, not sad at all Ms M.

Political Umpire said...

A brilliant comeback by Mr M, if I may say so. Others might have assumed you were pregnant and hit the panic button/popped the champagne cork accordingly (a friend of mine went shopping for a number of friends with babies once and left the piles of Mothercare/Baby Gap bags in the living room. When boyfriend came home later fairly drunk he sobered up in a great hurry ....

PS never. I like to think of blogging as a way of talking to myself without seeming like a weirdo (well, unless you read what I write, I suppose ...).

Curiously someone once reported to me feeling a similar desire regarding clothes and dancing when she was on cocaine, so you might just have been a druggie in your past life.

Ms Melancholy said...

Aah, Ms Signs - I could easily share a cigarette with you and fall in love with the moon. I love the night sky. It intrigues me when I go to the southern hemisphere, and see a different sky. I can understand why people believe in astrology. It all just seems so powerful and magical. I do like to think that I have been a witch. Sometimes I like to think that I still am.

Hey, P-Umpy. Mr M is known for his witty retorts. He is also known for his inappropriate sarcasm, however. It is such a thin line, isn't it? Baby Gap bags would fill hubby with immense joy - he has always wanted a big family. And then he would chastise me severely for shopping at gap. I am quite sure that the sore breasts are not pregnancy related, however - I still like to think it is something to do with this lovely moon. Cocaine has previously made me want to dance like a loon for several hours, but never naked and never at the top of a hill. It's a long time ago though, and I can barely remember.

Political Umpire said...

One of my favourite bloggers, Liz (of La Femme Contraire) has a post about the moon and astrology And All That, to which I've contributed my customary scepticism (she's of the same mind, incidentally). Though it seems to affect ladies more, as Liz and indeed China Blue are very up front about as well. On which my own comment would be superflous, needless to say. Even if I was female I doubt I'd be called a lady ...

Political Umpire said...

Why are we blogging so late anyway?

Ms Melancholy said...

Ah, yes! Good point! I quite like staying up very late on a Saturday. Hubby at work and I go back to my nocturnal self. Makes me feel young again, I think.

Have been over to Liz's tonight, actually. I am always reluctant to completely dismiss things out of hand, because we can't find a rational/scientific basis for them. The philosophy of science would suggest that we create our scientific realities, as much as uncover them. It is far too late for me to think seriously on this subject, though.....(I am a Libra. We like to see both sides... ;-)

Cursed Tea said...

so you've got a smart ass for a husband too!! Mine has been waxing smartily on overdrive since xmas (when he quit job he hated and moved up here from miami). A friend remarked that his smart assness must surely mean that he has inherited Einstein's butt!!

Glad you're enjoying the lunar power. Don't know if it is over here or not - but will be out drinking cocktails with the girlies - maybe that'll be feminine lunar crazy enough for tonight!

Sleep tight!
cursedtea

Dan said...

Hi Ms M

Just landed back at Chez Dan after a perfect night sampling quite a few, well more than a few, belgian beers, some sweet moroccan black, dancing like I was 20 again (Pulp, I miss you greatly) and a having a rather lovely parting snog to end with.

I thought I might wet my pants at Mr M's riposte to your sore breasts comment. It's a well known fact (i.e. complete old wives tale) in our CMHT that psychoses and therefore ASW assessments, cycle with the moon. I know you ladies get the worst half of the bargain, but this is a new one on me!

A propos of your last couple of comments on the other thread, I expect, nay demand, a hat-tip for any future posts of yours inspired by my rather brilliant comments on your rather brilliant blog!!!

I'm exceptionally happy tonight (could it be the eclipse, I now wonder), and all I want to do is pass it on.

All the best.

Caroline said...

Sorry - I wasn't around last night. Too busy nursing my throbbing breasts whilst running naked under the moon. It was fun.

x

Ms Melancholy said...

Hi Cursed Tea, probably no eclipse for you but who needs a reason for going out and drinking cocktails with the girlies? Especially if your husband is as smart ass as mine.

Hey Dan, sounds like you've had a good night! You know that I do appreciate your brilliant comments, and it does seem a shame that they are hidden away on an old post with no relevance at all to the discussion. Perhaps I should set up a special 'discussion page for Dan'?

Hi Caroline, thanks! I knew I could rely on you!

Calamity Jane said...

The full moon just makes me want to say "AaahWhoooOooooOOoooOOoooo!"

tyger said...

First we had the naked mud wrestling and now throbbing breasts under the moonlight.

This blog, and caroline's for that matter, are nothing but mild-porn sites passing themselves off as feminist intellectualism. I'm outraged.

You're charlatans. All of you.

tyger said...

Speaking of Pulp.

I understand Jarvis' new record is brilliant. Anyone got it?

Boris said...

Ms M
What do you mean "former life"?

Boris

Ms Melancholy said...

Hi CJ (did you watch The West Wing, by the way?) - you howl all you like if it makes you feel good.

Hi tygs - you may have a point. Whilst the feminist mud wrestling started out as a very serious solution for the discomfort we were experiencing in competing against each other, it quickly descended into smut. I am sorry for this. I know that you are a most serious blogger and that this kind of thing offends you. (By the way, did you enjoy your discipline session with Lavender the other day? She sure cracks a hot and sexy whip, doesn't she?)

Ms Melancholy said...

Hey Boris, quit joking or I'll hex you.

austin said...

Full moons, throbbing breasts - I'm there. Period time. Tidal power - Conception - Full Moon -:Full Easter Moon - Premature birth of daughter - And on it goes - Night after full moon in Melbourne, I see my favourite band - Calexico - Fantastic!!!!

tyger said...

What myself and Lavender get up to in the sanctity of Duckie's blog, is between me, Lavender, and Duckie's dry cleaner.

The cheek!

Ms Melancholy said...

Hi Austin - well, the rational-positivists may scoff, but my period just started a week early. Tell me that is a coincidence, huh? (I apologise if this is just too much information for some of you. Normal service will be resumed shortly.)

Oh, my dear tyger.
What myself and Lavender get up to in the sanctity of Duckie's blog, is between me, Lavender, and Duckie's dry cleaner. And you forgot to mention the rest of the blogosphere. There is no privacy around here. We are watching. Your every move. Be scared.

tyger said...

MsM

Do you work for someone I know?

lavenderblue said...

Ms Melancholy !
Laughing so much I spilt my sunday whisky !
Naughty Tyger............
Talking of naughty I had a serious meeting with a buyer for my paintings....
I thought he liked my rather twee things, well, maybe he does, but what he actually wants are porno drawings - bought me a book - 'Erotica' by Gilles Neret.........
and they say the internet is
dirty......every fetish known to mankind and tyger..and I did n't know Rembrandt was such a Filthy pervert.
Is this Art, I ask myself....reaching for the bottle ........
Have I missed the moon thingy ?

tyger said...

Have I missed the moon thingy ? ~ lavender

That depends on whether your breast were throbbing.

tyger said...

BTW

(I'm getting a reputation - am a serious blogger remember)

Good luck with the paintings Lavender.

Ms Melancholy said...

Hi Lavender,

unfortunately the eclipse was last night, so the answer to that one is yes. There should be another one in 3 years or so? Good luck with the paintings, by the way - porn or otherwise!

Hey tyger - do I work for someone you know? I remain anonymous, tyg. If I answered that I would have to kill you.
BTW - It's fun, taking a blogging break, isn't it? It's good to see you out and about, strutting your stuff. Just remember to keep it clean over here, mate. This is a serious blog, you know.
*Walks off, sniggering.*

dan said...

Oh Ms M, definately a top night and it's been a while (particularly the snogging!) so it was much appreciated. There was a price to pay this morning though *clutches head* but plink plink fizz and I was fine. In this age of digital technology, my only lament is video of my (somewhat unique) dancing was already doing the rounds on email this morning. I have a tendancy to get carried away with the moment. Poo!

yellowduck said...

Positively mad. All of you.

Caroline said...

Where you been hiding Dan? ;-)

The comments within your posts are getting stranger and stranger. Lavender Blue paints - perfect! Just as I imagined. Has she a blog?
Please say yes. Please say yes.
This is a serious blog Ms M.
*walks away skipping*

Caroline said...

Also - I'm surprised that pony boy hasn't been here. Most surprised.
x

Nikhil said...

Breasts being nursed because their strangely relevant association with moons being eclipsced by the sun.

Let me get this straight, can I not bite down if this particular planet's moon is playing traunt?

How bloody indecent!

I shall not stand for such lunacy. Lunacy of course being derived from Luna, does seem to strike a chord with the rest of the shamelessly pg-13 anecdotes masquerading as blog posts here.

But, I love the idea of having celestial movements affect every individuals' sex life. Love it! Wish I could know why H. Hefner's libido refuses to deflate. Does that have to do with the stars and general lunacy too?

Ms Melancholy said...

Hey Caroline, Dan and I had a bit of a chat on the Battle of the Blogs' post, once everyone had left. A bit like stragglers left at a party, sitting quietly in a corner discussing Derrida. I have now discovered his own blog which he was keeping from us, for some reason. I have been trying to persuade Lavender to write her own blog, but she is very shy. And Ducky stopped us talking about it cos he felt left out. It was in his living room, after all. I agree with you about Pony Boy. I miss him when he is quiet. He is definitely lurking because I've seen him on my stats, but for some reason even my sore breasts couldn't get him to talk this weekend.

Hi again Nikhil. I actually don't know how to respond to this comment. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about, and have decided just to smile and say hi, and hope that is enough. You are most welcome here, though. ;o)

The Moon Topples said...

On behalf of the moon, I feel I should apologize for any discomfort experienced due to our normally friendly satellite's recent behavior.

My own breasts were unaffected.

Caroline said...

Lavender is shy!?! You have made me smile this monday morning.
;-)

Political Umpire said...

"Then you got all these lady comics talkin' 'bout stuff that would embarrass REDD FOXX - God rest his smutty soul. Who they've slept with ... what time they sit on the can ... this stuff's supposed to get you a husband??!!?!?!"

Krusty the Clown

bobo said...

I had my last fill of dancing naked by firelight on a hillside in September, and probably will be again in May ... but that was over in North Wales, where such things are the norm, and fiancée and cousin are commonly synonyms.

So I just peeked at the moon every ten minutes after an exhausting training day and played with my secret tarot cards I don't tell anyone about...



Doh!

Though if my breasts had actually been sore I rather suspect I'd of confused it for one of those non specific middle-aged twinges, rather than the tug of the mystical. Can't help feeling I'm missing the point sometimes, on a cosmic scale.

Caroline said...

I live not at all far from North Wales. My husband's family are from North Wales.
Bobo clearly knows how to make friends. He is going on my list ;-)

x

Atyllah said...

Smart husband, must have a strong instinct for self preservation!

Ms Melancholy said...

Hey Mr Moon, it was a very beautiful sight, so don't apologise. I am only sorry that you couldn't see it over in Chicago.

Hi again Caroline - yes, apparently lavenderblue is shy! I have been trying to persuade her to write her own blog. Perhaps you should have a go too. (You listening, lavender?)

Hey P-Umpy - thanks for that! Just watching The Simpsons right now, actually. Fantastic. Lisa: "They are teaching us Creationism in school. We had a test today, and every answer was 'God did it' "

Hi again BoBo, - would that be for Samhain or is it Lammas in September? (Told you I was once a witch.) BTW, looks like you just pulled Caroline. I think she got turned on by the whole 'cousin/fiancee' thing and another excuse to get naked on a hill. She writes all her novels naked, you know? She is our proper little Bohemian chick, and is sometimes a cheap tart if you give her enough JDs.....Oops, sorry Caroline. Didn't realise you were listening in there. I was just telling BoBo what a fabulously sophisticated novelist you are....

Hi again Atyllah, yes he does know how to walk the line between being funny and staying alive. Mostly.

Caroline said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Caroline said...

MS MELANCHOLY!!!!!!!!!!
BEHAVE!
(you know that you're in trouble when I start calling you by your full name)
I have a sophisticated image to sustain! Or is it that I long for a sophisticated literary image ...

Oh bollocks to it. Hear me squeal as I run naked up the nearest hill.
x

Ms Melancholy said...

Hey Caroline, you're safe here. You can run wild and be yourself, and no-one will find you. (I do have an urge at the moment to call you 'Cas', by the way. Does anyone ever call you Cas? It just feels so matey and northern!) So, Cas, let your hair down, get your kit off and I'll go and call for BoBo.

Caroline said...

Yes Cas is my proper name. Caroline is my writer sophisticated name ;-)
x

Ms Melancholy said...

Oh, I just knew that you were a cas. I am so pleased. So pleased. It just suits you, somehow. So Caroline is your Sunday name? That all feels right, to me.

bobo said...

It was Samhain (pronounced as erratically as it is spelt). And it very agreeably involved digging a pit and refilling it with sieved earth, turned into glorious sticky warm mud with water from the hot tub, and sitting in it up to your armpits.
Makes Roman Catholic rituals quite tame in comparison.

And stop trying to match make, Ms M. Have you even seen Caroline's list. I'm concerned :-(

Miss Tickle said...

My hub made me go and look at it because he was feeling all gooey. I had flu. I was feeling gooey too, but in an entirely different way.